Musings on Mindless and Emotional Eating

I would never spend money if I didn’t know whether I had it.  

I do not charge things on my credit card unless I know I can pay them off in full.  I do not make large purchases unless I know I know I will be ok financially now and in the near future. I like to plan ahead and I’m pretty frugal...but more importantly responsible.

That being said, I’ve noticed a trend in my eating habits the lately (oh you know the last 6 months at least, the last few weeks for sure) that leans towards the exact mindset.  Sure I’m eating foods that great for me, dried cherries and blueberries, flax muffins, watermelon, etc... But too much of anything CAN be a bad thing.

Tonight, after ending the day in the red again I realized something.  I worked so hard to adjust my eating habits more towards a lifestyle change instead of a diet that I went too far the opposite.  I had counted obsessively and become too controlled and tried to loosen up, and in the process have now gotten way too lax.   I now eat healthfully of course, watch portions all day, but realized that I have been sabotaging myself in the afternoons and evenings by eating and tracking at the end or just hoping that once I’ve eaten something I won’t have gone over my daily caloric goal.

And then a light bulb occurred to me and I realized I would never go until the end of the month and then spend a bunch of money hoping I’d be ok until next month.  I would never charge something on my credit card without any idea of how it cost.

With money it makes sense – don’t spend more than you have and plan ahead…but doesn’t the same thing makes sense with food?  So why am I just hoping it will all end up ok at the end of the day instead of planning it all out?  It’s like they say, you can’t do the same thing over and over and expect different results.

I want so much to be able to eat however I want, when I want and not re-gain all the weight I spent years losing but the scale and my body say otherwise.  I'm doing what I've been doing, but hoping for new results without any new behaviors.  

I think its time for a change.